Since the moment he died I have been caught up with trying to glean some sort of meaning from Braedwyn's untimely passing. Some people have the luxury of certainty provided by the pat answers of their religion of choice or heredity. Nothing so simple satisfies me. I can (and have) entertained a multitude of potential 'answers.' Perhaps they have on occasion provided a moment's peace, but no more.
If he was 'too good for this world,' then what does that make the rest of us? And why can't a few more good souls be spared for this train wreck of a planet? Maybe it would improve. I wondered on occasion what sort of world he was going to inherit. Well, less wonder and more concern. I would console myself with the notion that, perhaps, he would do something to better this place, but, then again, I used to think that that's what I would do when I was young. The years have passed and mostly I am left with being annoyed that I haven't.
The explanations come and go, but the only thing I am consistently left with is the desire (or is it nagging?) to make it happen. Whatever it is. Pretty much the only thing that I think about when not engrossed in the moment or reflecting upon Braedwyn's absence. I don't know what it is, but I think I'll know it when I see it. So I hope.